Top 13 dumbest comments on the Iraq War ever… and other awards

As most of you will probably be aware, I made a post last week comparing the U.S. to Al Qaeda which generated nearly 450 comments and 14,000 hits.

However, the bulk of these comments were spread out over this blog, facebook, and  So, since I just finally got aroud to reading all of the comments now (my girlfriend and I have been apartment hunting together, so I haven’t had time to blog lately), I figured I’d have some fun and take all of the comments from all websites and come up with a series of awards for the comments generated by this post.

I’m calling it the Paulies and the categories are: Dumbest commentBest commentThe greatest one-post response to a previous comment and, lastly, the greatest overall exchange.

Much like the Oscars, yes, the Paulies are also political (and rigged so that Martin Scorsese can’t win).  And, also like he Oscars, the Academy for the Paulies (i.e., me) considers it an honour just to be nominated.

So, in the first category: greatest overall exchange, the nominees are:

#1)  The exchange between harlon57 and pointman on reddit.
#2)  The exchange between RPJ and Armando on
#3)  The exchange between Scheissen and hagbardceline on

And the winner is…..

The exchange between Scheissen and hagbardceline on! [music]

by Scheissen on 5/28/07 – 4 diggs
Bullshit. This is pure sensationalism propaganda from a socialist (he even has a link to about Marxism!). The United States didn’t and couldn’t cause 1.6 million deaths in seventeen years. And yet that person believes all killing is terrorism. I may have to bookmark this site just to laugh at it.
In recent news,
“U.S. frees 42 al Qaeda kidnap victims in Iraq”

by hagbardceline on 5/28/07 + 3 diggs
Ok, so what number would be acceptable then?

by Scheissen on 5/28/07 – 3 diggs
How about not an imaginary inflated number? Let me guess, you’re the same person that believes the U.S. cause 600,000 deaths in the Iraqi war and not the 60,000 number.

by hagbardceline on 5/28/07 – 2 diggs
Don’t take any guesses, you don’t know me.
Way to dodge the question though, sparky. You can try again now.

by Scheissen on 5/28/07 – 2 diggs
Who the fuck even said there was an “acceptable number.” Thanks for assuming.

by hagbardceline on 5/28/07 + 1 digg
Aww that’s cute. You’ve taken a position you can’t quantify. Adorable.

by Scheissen on 5/28/07  – 3 diggs
You fucking moron, you insult me because I was “guessing” you and you made an assumption question for me to answer when it wasn’t even outlined in my post.

by hagbardceline on 5/28/07 + 1 digg
It’s an easy question man, since we are in a thread that addresses it, I thought it might be relevant.
“You fucking moron, you insult me because I was “guessing” you and you made an assumption question for me to answer when it wasn’t even outlined in my post.”
Since that is your submission for a credible thought, no less distinct english, I’ll go ahead and treat your further posts as if it were from a monkey with language.

In the second category: The greatest one-post response to a previous comment, the nominees are:

#1)  EntropyMan on

by wintermd on 5/27/07 – 7 diggs
Dems have a plan for Iraq yet?. They have been in power for how long? No plan yet?

by EntropyMan on 5/28/07 + 4 diggs
There’s wintermd, on queue, with the only words he knows how to say. Is it a keyboard macro at this point? F6 = spout bullshit?

#2)  xTRUMANx on

by wildone on 5/28/07 – 2 diggs
Our boys and girls are over there fighting a war with the SOB’S who took 2 air planes and crashed them into the world trade center. Before we got there the women of the country had no rights to anything education, voting, and any other right we Americana’s take for granted everyday. We are not terrorist we are the defenders of freedom. If you cant tell the deference them move your but over there and live in the middle east and see how great the locals are!

by xTRUMANx on 5/28/07 – 2 diggs
Actually, I’ve lived in the mid-east for 17 years. And I don’t stay in the U.S. so your argument of, “If you cant tell the deference them move your but over there and live in the middle east and see how great the locals are!” makes you look stupid, which makes your country look stupid (no offense americans, but that guy is making you look dumb). My family and I have enjoyed our stay in the mid east and we have never complained about women’s rights, not that we’re afraid, but we’ve accepted it. I know it may look like people have no rights (to you), nor am I saying there aren’t people in the mid east who want a more western like life, but most of us there enjoy life there and don’t appreciate foreign nations trying to stuff their values down our throats.
As for your boys and girls, whom you say are, “over there fighting a war with the SOB’S who took 2 air planes and crashed them into the world trade center” aren’t doing that in fact. America didn’t go to Iraq over Al-Qaeda and it’s obvious that you have been fed bullshit as to why your “boy and girls” are over there.

#3)  Schwallex from

Jewjr -2 points 6 days ago
The guys mixing apples and oranges comparing terrorism to America. Actions that a government makes are far different then those of a terrorist. The main difference is a government should and can be held accountable for its actions.

Schwallex 11 points 6 days ago
Wait a minute. So, if Osama bin Laden and his followers founded a state of their own, if would be perfectly okay for them to come over and kill 655,000 Americans? You know, they could pretend to bring democracy to your country. And to get rid of your WMD, which you actually have.
“Actions that a government makes are far different then those of a terrorist.”
Well, that’s the entire point. Actions that the current U.S. government makes are not “far different then those of a terrorist”. You haven’t been following the news in the recent years, have you?

#4)  conundri from

(responding to multiple comments that I was deliberatly misconstruing the term ‘terrorism’ to further my ideological/rhetorical/communist goals.)

conundri 3 points 6 days ago
Let me take you back in time, to when the word Terrorism was first coined… It began as government intimidation during the Reign of Terror in France (1793-1794), from the French word terrorisme.
“If the basis of a popular government in peacetime is virtue, its basis in a time of revolution is virtue and terror — virtue, without which terror would be barbaric; and terror, without which virtue would be impotent.” [Robespierre, speech in Fr. National Convention, 1794]
At the time, the French government was routinely using public executions with the guillotine against almost random citizens to perpetuate the state of fear that had brought the new government into power…
Simply redefining a word to not include yourself, or your own group’s actions does not change reality. A government can be terrorist in nature. Some examples might include Tiananmen Square, or even our own Kent State massacre, and I would argue that it is not even necessary for people to be killed in a terrorist act. Mass arrests for political purposes / imprisoning dissidents, or the taking of hostages would be examples of terrorist actions on either side of the line of government that don’t necessarily involve death.
Hope this sheds some light on the discussion from another vantage point…

And the winner is…..

#1)  EntropyMan! [music]

In the third category: Best comment, the nominees are:

#1)  innocentbystander

How many do we have to kill before we prove we’re civilized?

#2)  Aeaus

But we’re doing it in the name of freedom, and they, they, they, they’re doing it for something else.

#3)  njharman

U.S. definition of terrorism “activities that involve violent… or life-threatening acts… that are a violation of the criminal laws of the United States or of any State and… appear to be intended (i) to intimidate or coerce a civilian population; (ii) to influence the policy of a government by intimidation or coercion; or (iii) to affect the conduct of a government by mass destruction, assassination, or kidnapping;”
I always felt “Regime Change” fit nicely into subitem iii. And “Regime Change” was the goal of the neocons which I place squarly behind this preemptive invasion. Of course somewhere in the law I believe it says individual or group. So, States are free to be as “terroistic” as they want.
Like most things in U.S. foreign relations there exists a dual-standard. One standard for US, another for them.

#4)  Iain Grey

Just reading the comments alone is enough to put anyone off American society. WMD? The US is the country not to trust with anything more powerful than a tennis ball.
Why are Americans proud to be so? It baffles me

And the winner is…..

#3)  njharman

Now, lastly, for the category we’ve all been waiting for.  The final category for tonight is: Dumbest comment.

Now, obviously, with a subject which gets the conservative wingnuts crazy like this one, there has to be a large number of nominees.  Now, ordinarily, it’s not nice to mock the mentally ill, but in the interest of the Paulies, it is worth shining the spotlight on some of the more glorious commentators on this subject.

So, with that in mind, the nominees are…

#1) Brent

Communism is coming to America. All I can say is that if you love your country and freedom, BUY GUNS, because commies want to take your freedom from you. Just ask Hillary Clinton. Burn in hell commies!

#2) YourAparrot

Rosie and you are ignorant. The civilian deaths in iraq can mostly be attributed to suicide bombings by muslim extremists. It’s true the US has killed many innocents in this terribly managed war, i’m not doubting that, but to say every death in iraq can be attributed to the US is the kind of statement that shows how much control the leftist media has over those who cannot think for themselves. I don’t think rosie should be fired for parroting lies, but your blind faith in her argument shows that if she had been let go earlier this world would be a better place.

The funny part that I find about Youraparrot (other than the fact that he doesn’t understand the difference between your and you’re) is that these deaths were caused by the U.S.’s illegal war in Iraq. Since the U.S. knowingly and willfully brought about the circumstances which caused these deaths, this, in any court of law, constitutes legal and moral culpability.  Apparently, though, it’s hard thinking critically on big scales like that.

#3) ericgonzalez

…It’s been long established that yelling “fire!” in a crowded theater isn’t free speech – likewise calling our military “terrorists” isn’t political expression…

#4) rmuser

Al Qaeda. The US is not a terrorist organization. This is a terribly flawed comparison. Hey, which has more delicious apple flavor, an apple or an orange?

#5) Armando

This is amazing to me. America is the most just and responsible nation ever to exist on this planet. Look at history….

#6) Brent

What is truly sad is how ignorant most of these comments are. LONG LIVE AMERICA! And happy memorial day. It’s a good thing that these American “terrorists” gave their lives to defend you little ungrateful brats.
Paul, you make me want to puke. I would love to fatten your lip. The fact that these un-American comments are being made on Memorial Day, just shocks and offends me.
LONG LIVE AMERICA! Love it or leave it.
P.S., It looks like we finally we get to bomb Iran (hopefully)!

#7) david

Dear Paul,
Please move to Canada or anywhere outside the U.S. I will pay for your ticket. Maybe Iran?

I’m not making this one up.  He actually wrote this.

#8) good

I haven’t read any of the comments but regarding the original article……that is great news…I wish the number was higher….if you mess with the U.S. you are going to have to pay…….pretty good deterrent to any future hostilities against us…..

#9) palish

We’re not fighting them based on how many of us they’ve killed. We’re fighting them based on how barbaric they are. Remember the video of the girl being brained with rocks because she decided to love someone of a different religion? Yeah, that’s what we’re fighting.

Yeah I seem to remember Bush saying that as his justification for going to war.  Yes, it was all about how barbaric the Iraqi people are.  I remember.   It’s all coming back to me now.

#10) gman1948

Yeah, OK…..numbnuts, your like the drugged out hippies of the Vietnam era (Who are now the CEOs of our nations economy…can you say sellouts?) They claim something like 6,000,000 deaths in Vietnam caused not by the VC and North Vietnam Regulars, but by the USA! Thats like 50% of the population and total BS.
The Iraqi ragheads are killing doxzens of their own people everyday..100X more that the USA precision bombing! Your full of horsepooky!

#11) gman1948

OH……a post script……….There would be no USA casualties in Iraq if the USA followed my lead. On 9/12/2001, I would have hit every major Muslim city on the planet in every Muslim country, yes Mecca and Medina especially, with 10 megaton nuclear missiles.
Kill them all, let God sort them out!

#12) confuzed

are you honestly saying that U.S. soldiers have actually killed 650,000 Iraqis? and that not a single iraqi has been killed by Al Qaeda?
are U.S. troops lining up iraqs each day , 500 at a time, and shooting them? is that what you saying?

I liked this comment.  Do you know what this is called, kids?  That’s right, this is a false dichotomy.

#13) Mark

The figure 650,000 is a made up bullshit number.
If sanctions are terrorism, the the U.N. is a terrorist organization. Oh we knew that already.
Why do you give Saddam a pass? Oh yea, you liked his “enlightened” rule of Iraq.
Real facts:
300,000 Kurds gassed (WMD btw) Saddam.
100,000 plus murdered by Saddam each year
100,000 plus tortured or imprisoned or both for speaking out or opposing Saddam.
Yea, he was just a good ol boy in a tough situation. The U.S. is evil.
Grow up. Stop spinning tall tales to justify your irrational hatred of the U.S. or more likely Bush.
If you have to say things like “Now America’s activities abroad are far too numerous to either delineate or to quantify, so, for simplicity’s sake, let’s limit it only to US involvement in the country of Iraq since the enactment of UN resolution 667 in 1990 up to the present”; you should just be honest and say “I’m making this shit up as I go along because I hate Bush.” Plus if you don’t restrict it to Iraq, you look like an idiot. Well you do anyway.
Grow up people.

And the winner is…..

#4) rmuser.  That’s right folks.  Al Qaeda is a terrorist organization because we label it a terrorist organization; and the United States can’t commit terrorism because it’s not a terrorist organization; and it’s not a terrorist organization because it’s not labeled as a terrorist organization.

Now THAT’S American ingenuity for you!


9 Responses to “Top 13 dumbest comments on the Iraq War ever… and other awards”

  1. 1 Scott 4 June, 2007 at 8:50 am

    Hi Paul…congrats on stirring up so much right-wing outrage! :)

    It’s interesting, though…I mean, it’s obviously no surprise that such profound ignorance is out there, but I suppose I don’t go out of my way to encounter it most of the time so seeing it so unabashedly displayed is…well, it’s probably good for me, but it is also kind of discouraging. Anyway, there are certainly some classics among your nominees…it must have been a difficult process for the Academy to arrive at its decisions!

  2. 2 Red Jenny 4 June, 2007 at 8:57 am

    I think I’m going to start calling my oranges “apples” because then they’ll have more delicious apple flavour.

    Thanks for the laughs.

  3. 3 Herbinator 4 June, 2007 at 9:21 am

    A great post. Perhaps even a best blog posting.

  4. 4 Erik Abbink 6 June, 2007 at 1:09 am

    “Like most things in U.S. foreign relations there exists a dual-standard. One standard for US, another for them.”

    It looks like Chomsky’s pseudonym has been revealed: njharman it is!

    I enjoyed the post; Cheers.

  5. 5 paulitics 6 June, 2007 at 2:22 pm

    Erik, yeah I thought that was very Chomsky-esque. I figured you’d like that one.

    Oh. PS, I’m still trying to hunt down an undamaged .mp3 version of Chomsky’s talk on anarcho-syndicalism from the 1970s that I told you about at the Simpsons and Marxism meeting. Most versions of it seem to be damaged, but I’m keeping my eyes out for one that isn’t.

  6. 6 Lorenzo E. Danielsson 7 June, 2007 at 9:48 pm

    gman1948: All those spelling errors make me think that he belongs to the “drugged out hippie” group.

    david: do you think he could buy me a ticket as well? I’d really like to take the kids to Euro Disney..

    ericgonzalez: I have heard many stupid things uttered in my life but this one still leaves me speechless..

    Armando: I agree fully with this one. Especially dropping those nukes on an already defeated nation really was a show of responsibility.

    rmuser: Personally, I’ve always liked the apple flavor of bananas.

    Iain Grey: Give them a tennis ball? No, thank you. Ever heard of “Pistol Pete”?

  7. 7 ladyperfection 27 May, 2008 at 6:10 am

    Nice blog, but where is your post RSS? I see only comments RSS one.

  8. 8 Gman1948 4 October, 2008 at 1:37 pm

    Gee, thanks for the nomination. Sorry i don’t carry a dictionary with me or the spot for comment doesn’t have a “spell checker”. My degree is in Political Science not English Grammer!

    I have had coworkers, point out spelling errors in emails and memos…….I really don’t care and it’s petty, since you can’t fault what I say!

    More left wing bull crap. Bow to Mecca five times a day, asswipe!

  1. 1 Crazy, stupid and just plain weird things people google search for « Paulitics: Paul’s Socialist Investigations Trackback on 19 October, 2007 at 10:58 pm

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